Now that I tweet, all the stupid things and great pieces of hard-fought wisdom that cross my mind while I’m working and that I occasionally collect in a post for the benefit of the multitudes are much easier to find.
1. Manic pixie dream girls are flat characters.
2. The look of love is that thing that makes you see somebody with tolerably decent looks, rhinestone on the ass and a bit of brains as the quintessence of all splendor, glamour and genius.
3. Signs of the death of a couple: #1 – a former über-privacy-maniac suddenly starts uploading and tagging pics of the two of them together on social networks (I’ve done this myself a few years ago, actually).
4. Getting thinner has never been easier: all you have to do is eat less.
5. A place full of women: a lot of cooking and recrimination going on at all times.
6. “Choose the sources of the quotes you publish on the Internet carefully.” – Confucius
7. Thoughts while full: What is going to be Pakistan’s policy towards this blatant invasion of their territory?
Thoughts while hungry: Chicken Peshawari in Abbottabad must be delicious.
8. Compliments are like retweets. Addicting.
9. Films that display personality disordered behavior as normal (or even romanticized) get on my nerves (Breakfast at Tiffany’s, 500 Days of Summer).
10. There’s something about elderly people watching you work: you start at 9am, at 9.30 they’re already talking about you with unparalleled pity.
11. The purpose of mothers is to benignly thwart you in your ambitions (whatever – good or bad – you’ve planned to do: to start/quit cigarettes/drinks, a diet, too many – or fewer – working/study hours, getting your own laundry done). And the next thing they’ll do is make you feel guilty about it. This frustrating lose-lose situation goes on until they live; your only hope is that they be likewise thwarted by their own mothers, leaving you in peace for a bit.